Rihanna at the Grammy's
Miley Cyrus
I am having a hard time feeling good about myself today. My mom just keeps putting me down all the time and sometimes I just feel like leaving home and living on my own but I have no place to go but on the streets and I am terrified of the streets. I don’t know what to do to get along with my mom. I sometimes think that she feels I have no right to happiness. Whenever I am having fun she tries to bring me down with negativity. I am a 16 year old Black girl.
Tired
Dear Tired,
Parents, though sometimes well meaning can do more to hurt than help their children’s self-esteem. Some of us have never outgrown the mindset of a slave. Sometimes parents try to clip our wings because they don’t want us to fly too high and get shot down by racist. They try to keep us safe by keeping us down to earth.
I suggest you sit your mother down and tell her how it makes you feel when she does and say the things that are hurtful. Let her know times have changed and you deserve to be happy and to achieve as much as you want. Ask her to give you a chance. Tell her that her encouragement and support mean a lot to you and finally tell her how much you love her. Maybe you are both locked into different sides of the same room. Don’t leave home, work it out my child, talk it out, cry it out, get your aunt, a friend or someone you trust to intervene. The relationship between a mother and her daughter runs deep and if there is problem neither of you can be truly happy with your lives until it is fixed somehow.
globalcounselor 