My weight is bearing down on me

Dear globalcounselor,
I’m 15 years old.  My problem is that I feel very bad about the way I look. I feel fat and ugly.  My friends and family reassure me that I am good looking and not overweight but whenever I look in the mirror I see a lot of negative things about myself.  What can I do to change this behaviour. I am tired of feeling so down.

Dear Feeling so Down,
  There are many young girls who feel exactly the way you do. I think the media pressure to be thin has had a bad influence on women and especially young girls like yourself.
   Sometimes the feeling we have about ourselves is a symptom of some other issue we are facing. I suggest you talk to your school counsellor and perhaps you could be referred to an appropriate service. I want you to know that you are not alone. It is a societal problem and if your family and friends tell you that you’re okay perhaps you can pretend they are telling the truth and go with that.  Good luck.

 

Dear globalcounselor,
  I am 16 years old. I had a boyfriend who is three years older than I am.  He is very nice and caring but I don’t feel as if I am ready for a steady boyfriend. I want to take things easy but I don’t want to hurt his feelings.  He is quite serious and very intelligent. I am so confused because I like him but I don’t want to be serious. Confused.

Dear Confused,
I think in this case honest would be the best policy. Talk to your boyfriend and express how you feel. Tell him you are not ready for any big commitment and how would he feel about giving you the time and space you need to grow up.
  At 16 it’s difficult to know what you want.  Let him decide what’s best for him. You have to be prepared that he might want to call it quits.
  I know that once you tell it like it is you will feel much better and there will be greater understanding between the two of you if he is intelligent as you say he is.
  The truth never hurts when told up front but it does hurt if you tell only when caught.

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